Movie Review Time!!

Double the exclamation points means double the movies! Yep... I got 2 sets to review 'cuz (sadly) I've watched my latest set of 5 already.

• Hard Boiled - John Woo... This wasn't that great. Mostly made of weaksauce, but it has it's moments. I think there are other movies you could waste your time with.
  
• Don't Look Now - Between this, and the Body Snatchers movie, I think Donald Sutherland is the epitome of creepy '70s horror. Most of the beginning part was kinda boring, but man... The ending... I mean, it's nothing really shocking, but it just ups the creeper factor... Geh! It's worth it to see this just for that weird crap at the end. Plus, I dunno... The retro factor is nice too.
  
• Fear and Trembling - This is one of those ones that I saw on the shelf and thought "Hrmmmm.... This could be interesting..." and then I watched it and pretty much it wasn't. I suppose it gives a bit of a glimpse in to Japanese corporate life, but it's not like I would have any way to evaluate the truth. So you just have to take it at face value, and then it's just kinda retarded. I mean, it sorta defies you to believe that some of those people's behavior is mostly based on reality, and like, I just don't buy it. And even if it is true, the movie-fied version of it is still pretty retarded.
  
• The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - So you sci-fi purists out there will probably hate me, but I sorta liked this movie. What I liked is that it didn't take itself too seriously and just tried to be enjoyable. The little animated infographics were cool too. Interestingly enough, I am actually somewhat inspired to try and read the book now, as a result of watching this. Plus, WTF is Mos Def doing in this?! Crazy...
  
• We Own the Night - This was probably one of the most mediocre movies I've ever seen. It's not horrible, but it wasn't interesting. It pretty much walks a straight line right down the middle. Totally mediocre... Would you be let down if you saw it? I guess it depends on whether you think it would be good or total shit... Personally, I'd aim for total shit so you're actually impressed... :P
  
• The Forbidden Kingdom - Jet Li & Jackie Chan... With both of these dudes in one movie, you'd expect it to be totally fucking kick ass... But what this is, it's a fucking family movie... It's based on the old Chinese fable of the Monkey King, but I said "based on"... Meaning that they pretty much destroyed it with their stupid bullshit. And the kid in this movie is more pathetic than Ralph Macchio in the Karate Kid... Don't waste your time with this crap.
  
• Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie - Ok... Humor me for a second while I let out my inner geek. I actually liked the TV program, back when Joel was the guy stuck out in space. Then I guess he got bored or rich or something and quit and they got this other guy Mike to be the "host". This movie had "Mike" as the host... It's really strange that they made a movie off of the TV show, mainly because it's a movie where you watch people watch movies.... It's one of the things I liked about the TV show. You actually got to watch all the campy/crappy movies from the good ol' days of crappy movies, but it's got a running (hilarious) dialog to go with it. The show was gloriously low budget, and for some reason, putting the Hollywood polish on things kinda made it less genuine. Anyway, I still don't like "Mike" as the host, but I must admit that I actually laughed out loud at some parts. So good job... I dunno if I'd have paid money for this, but I would buy DVD's of the old series with Joel...
  
• Scanners - I didn't actually get to see the whole thing. It's not my fault. The DVD was faulty, scratched or something. So at some point in the middle somewhere, it just dumps you back out to the title menu. So I kinda had to skip over some parts. But I guess since I watched the beginning, some of the middle, and the end, I guess this kind of counts as a total viewing. Cronenberg scores again with this one. It's not perfect, but I liked the unintentionally cheesy special effects. I miss that kind of shit in movies. Now it's all CG and it's just not believable. Sorry... Computer generated effects are not believable at all. They never will be, so just stop trying.
  
• Evil Dead - Man... I think I always got this confused with Army of Darkness. I never could understand why people liked this shit, but it's because I based my understanding on Army of Darkness, which is fucking terrible. And when you consider that Raimi also directed the boring Spiderman movies... I just couldn't figure out the following... Then I finally saw this.... Holy shit. Evil Dead is great! I mean, it's fucking retarded, but it's good. Totally glad I finally watched this. Oh, and this wins too in the bad special effects category.... Hahahahaha... ha...
  
• Ray - I think I may have watched and reviewed this already. I don't remember. Hopefully I don't contradict myself... hahahaha.... Anyway, I know Ray Charles did some great musical things with his life, but this movie was boring. I wish Hollywood would get their shit together and just make a documentary instead of making pseudo-factual movies. I mean, a Ken Burns-esque documentary about Ray Charles would be really cool and interesting. Instead, we have Jamie Foxx acting like a blind dude (somewhat poorly I might add...) and maybe portraying Ray Charles accurately. But since Mr. Charles died a few years back, there's no way to know if he did a good job or not. So why didn't they just make a documentary? I don't have a clue. And if you're interested in learning about the "Black Experience in America" you're much better off watching Eyes on the Prize instead of this thing...

Well, there it is... 10 movies... Yep. 10...

Yup....